Search me, O God, and know my heart...

"...Try me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting." {Psalm 139:23-24} 
I've been mediating on Psalm 139 today. This verse has always been a favorite of mine, especially in the context of the entirety of this sweet Psalm from David. But today, it hit me, what a bold prayer this is. God, Lord of all, invited in to the tempestuous depths of my heart. There's so much in there, so much I'd rather clean up, or just plain hide before inviting the precious Abba into this place. What would He find lurking in there? Would He love me less? Wish He hadn't gone there?

In these times of struggles, of pursuing that Still Small Voice until the silence is almost deafening with anticipation and desperation, The Word speaks, and reminds me that I know the answer to these questions. They're written in the very place He dares to go, where He has made a home...

What would He find? A broken human, desperately in need of a Living Saviour. 

Would He love me less? "You hem me in, behind and before, and lay your hand upon me." {Psalm 139:5} No. He's got me. Always has, and always will. 

Wish He hadn't gone there? He already went there, straight up to that cross, so that He may embrace me, even in my sinful state, and love me as His own.

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