Writing Like It's My Job or In Which I Build My Case for Landing a Literary Agent, Dammit

Ok, so lately I have been a little writing machine. It seems that every time someone "outs" me as a writer, I'm suddenly inundated with tasks that call for such talents. (And, as y'all well know, there is a hell of a lot more to writing than simply stringing together coherent sentences, though that is a battle in-and-of-itself for some. Comma splice.* That's all I have to say about that.)

I have spent the last few days working on the layout and text for a sample newsletter for our cosmetic dermatology clients (day job), as well as generating and editing the homepage text for a friend's business website. Now don't get me wrong: I absolutely love doing stuff like this. I'm in my element and simultaneously justifying the $50,000 my mother very generously forked over for me to go attend a New York City art school to study writing. (Hey, no one said a penchant for perfect grammar and voracious consumption of books is cost-effective.)

Quick interjection: I do realize the irony of blogging about writing. Thanks.

It occurred to me today that writing has been one of the few consistent passions in my life, right up there with acting. And french fries.* I've talked many times about writing a book and going after a literary agent with unyielding focus, most notably a few months ago (see over-zealous Facebook announcements). And I still plan to do that.

I mean, I'm a literary agent's dream:

Exhibit A - I love deadlines! They're like little To-Do lists you are required to complete on a regular basis. And you get paid for doing them, not to mention the priceless satisfaction one experiences with such closure. (Just nod and smile.)

Exhibit B - I think in written text. My thoughts are organized into precise little paragraphs. I swear, sometimes I hear the "Bing!" of a typewriter when I'm thinking. There's a thesaurus somewhere up there too. So writing is not exactly a stretch, especially if I can write in my own goofy voice. Which brings us to...

Exhibit C - I think I have a unique perspective. My voice isn't necessarily exceptional (as I know many notable bloggers and writers who have similar styles and outlooks), but I think my experiences are novel and amusing. That's a start, at least. In college I always had the technicalities down, but sucked (you won't see that on a Hit Parade, my friends) when it came to content. Now I've at least got some interesting stories to relay or from which to build.

A wise** professor once told me that a big step toward becoming a successful writer is accepting one's identity as a writer.*** I think we have to embrace that we look at the world far differently than, say, a painter or an engineer. We process thoughts and feelings through words. I know I'm preaching to the choir, but I should remind y'all that not everyone behaves this way. This is what makes you and me who we are, just as much as the people by whom we were raised (for better or for worse).

But, for what it's worth, this is something of our own. Something we can hold on to and know that we belong to a very sacred sect of people. Some of us write for fun, some to keep record, and some to make money. But regardless of our motivation, we are writers. In our hearts and souls.*

I don't know about you, but I can think of a worse fate.

*In my blog, I am allowed to use all the fragment sentences I want. Just so ya know.
**Who says adults can't be wise while sporting pigtails?!

***She also said to avoid using "one('s)" wherever possible, but I play by my rules on my damn blog. Capishe?

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